the blessing in disguise

hah! my last post was almost a year ago! how pathetic is that. I knew it. whenever March comes, I will be all, ok shit is getting down for realsies. for years it has been like that. I bought my laptop in March 2016, full swing semangat to write a book. And I did write, still am writing now. But then I got pregnant so I had to put writing at the back burner. Then March 2017, I was still getting used to having two kids. Writing was a sometimes or whenever I have the time, which is no time, kinda thing. And now March 2018. I decided like omg quit making excuses! I am not getting any younger, if I ever want to have this book deal a real deal, I have to up my game.

I started to think really hard what was wrong with me. what is my problem? I am a housewife, I can soo do this. Then it hit me slowly and surely. I spent too much time on social media i.e Instagram whenever I am not spending time with my kids. I spend time with them a lot so I felt like I deserve some break at times. Social media or mostly instagram was kinda like my me-time. It was easy, I don't have to do anything. I don't have to go out. I just scroll scroll or post somepictures or Ig stories.  now that i think of it, I was wasting too much time. So I thought, ok, I need to do something about it. But it was just not happening. I still curi curi tengok jugak. Until something happened and that was it. I decided to take myself out of this social media deal and just live in the real world, #ITRW.

Starting end of February, I archived most of my pictures and slowly decrease my time spent on IG. Then, started 1.3.2018, uninstalled my Instagram. I don't have FB app and I seldom log on to facebook so that was not so much of a big deal. It felt empty for the first two days, like whenever I pick up my phone to check my instagram feed, it wasn't there and I had to say to myself, 'deal with it'

After a few days I got used to not having instagram on my phone. In fact, I was starting to feel free. I was starting my social media cleansing. I felt no longer toxic to the social media world and my mind became so free. I managed to read more and I started writing again. I have the 20minutes block rule. I block everything and write for a whole 20 minutes. It feels great! Bam! ideas came flowing and I was and still am typing! my laptop was on fire! and with fitbit monitoring my activities, and now that I am slowly tengah ganti puasa. It feels so great alhamdulillah. I managed to get so many things done. like so many! today I didn't even look at my phone. Ikhwan called me a few times just to check if I was ok.

All I am saying is that, thanks to that thing happened, now I feel so free and relaxed and I can get more things done. I finally transferred the pictures from my phone to my hard disc, managed to organize my kitchen, the kids's closet, rearranged stuff in the house, and it's only been six days. Alhamdulillah. I am so thankful for this blessing in disguise. I am not sure who will be reading this but if anyone who reads this, if you are trying to get off social media, I'd say, just do it. you will not regret it :) I am trying to see how long this can last. wish me luck!!